Saturday, August 17, 2013

How to Identify the Psychopath in Our Midst

We live in a socio-economic world created by and for psychopaths. Yes Virginia, the inmates ARE running the asylum. The vast majority of the world elite, those at the top of banking, business and politics, those who are intoxicated by money and power, are clinically mentally insane!

How else can they explain the intentional destruction of our precious planet and the degradation and enslavement of their fellow humans?  If you aren't totally outraged, you haven't been paying attention.  Sadly, the majority of the good people of the world are asleep at the wheel while our vehicle is careening towards the cliff of imminent disaster.

There are those among us who are inflicted with varying degrees of this same illness. They are referred to as Boarderline Personality Disorder and Sociopaths. Sociopaths differ from psychopaths mostly in the degree to which they are willing to inflict pain and suffering on others.

Here's what I've learned about these types of people from personal experience...  My mother, my step-father and my ex-husband are all borderline personalities. My step-sister, my half- brother and my biological father are all full on sociopaths.

These types of personalities usually appear superficially charming and engaging in the beginning, but they don't really know how to have relationships, they only know how to manipulate others to get what they want, and the relationship lasts only for as long as the other person is willing to allow themselves to be manipulated.

These types can do only for themselves, but would rather others do for them, and they don't ever do for others in return unless there is some significant benefit in it for them. The only reason one of these types seeks a relationship with you is because they believe you have something they want.  They tend to make many more withdrawals than deposits from the emotional bank account of their relationships, which always end overdrawn.

They feel deeply for themselves, but there is precious little room in their hearts for anyone else. They are completely self focused and incapable of experiencing selfless unconditional love.  They will take your love and then betray you, because they think you are the same as them, and given the chance, you would screw them, so that justifies them doing it to you first.

It is important to these people for others to see them in a particular way, even though it's not important to them to actually be that way, so they tend to spin facades around themselves and wear masks.

They need recognition for their self-perceived specialness so will seek roles or jobs that get media attention, awards and acclaim.  They are highly competitive and often will resolve to win at any cost.

They will never tell you the truth, they will only tell you what they want you to know.  They don't necessarily lie per se, they spin, embellish or omit. You will never really know them, because they don't share their true feelings, because it makes them vulnerable to those - like themselves - who would exploit another person's weakness and/or confidence.

They have no ethical problems with breaking their promises, they only make promises to enlist others to do the same, to benefit from the integrity of others who actually keep their word. When they do give, it is always with conditions, strings and expectations.

They may be lonely and want company, but will not reach out to another or extend a helping hand.  They are the special ones who deserve attention, so if they don't get it, they won't give it, and it is the fault of others, which is a good excuse for them to slight others and go back on promises.

These people see generosity, compassion and empathy as weaknesses and see themselves as strong because they are not restrained by such illusions, and can take advantage of or exploit those weaker than themselves to their own benefit without remorse, because only the strong survive.

Does any of this sound like someone you know? If it does, don't make the mistake in thinking they can be rehabilitated or "fixed". This is who they are and they will never change for you or anyone. My personal experience in dealing with these types is that there is no dealing with them. If you want to participate in an emotional exchange, they are not the kind to choose to get involved with no matter how charming or seemingly sincere.

My advice is to stay as far away from these types of people as possible. They will only leave you abused, depleted and feeling miserable, thinking there is something wrong with you. There is nothing wrong with you, unless you think you can rescue or save these souls. Do yourself a favor, love them from a distance and practice peaceful non-cooperation in all your interactions with boarderline personalities, sociopaths or psychopaths.

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